Tuesday, April 10, 2007

ugjgjghfgsreaeraz

I have decided to accept the fact that there will always be people:
funnier
cuter
better
more cunning
skinner
prettier
more fashionable
wittier
with better taste
more likeable
smarter
purer
more outgoing
than me.
It's not that I like it, its that I accept it, it's that I've comes to terms with it.
I've decided to try not to dwell on it.
I am of course dwelling on it tonight
But I have come to terms
with being second best
or third best
or just the worst in general.
Is that why I cant work it out?
Is that why it never works out?
Is that why I can be so sad at times?
I feel like the worst person on the planet
But not because I didn;t do enough for my friends
but because I feel like I am
the most
worthless
stupidest
boringest
fattest
ugliest
human being on the planet.
And I'm ok with it.
Well, no, but I have come to terms with it.
I have accepted it.

Here I go...feeling sorry for myself again,
I just hate myself more for it.